Wednesday, January 16, 2013


Are you feeling betrayed by Lance Armstrong?  Did you buy and wear that rubber yellow bracelet, proudly declaring yourself as a drinker of his Kool Aid?  Are you now feeling like you have been conned?  Lied to?  USED?

That's because you were, Lance Armstrong is a liar, has always been a liar and is still lying.

This is not the braying of a dismayed believer, I passed on that cup of Kool Aid when it first started flowing. This is the woman that all of you jeered at when she said that Lance was nothing but a fame whore who took performance enhancing drugs to win a game.  Which is cheating and therefore not the action of an honorable man.

The only reason Lance Armstrong is coming forward now is because he knows the battle to keep his lie alive is more than lost. Now he is desperate to hold on to what little fame he has by playing the part of the prodigal son, pretending to be chastened, claiming that he has learned his lesson.

I don't follow the news so I didn't hear about this whole business until late last night.  Clyde was filling me in with a very surprised expression in his eyes; Lance went on Oprah Winfrey's show and came clean.  I was shocked myself, this was real news to me and I still don't want to believe it.  Oprah has another show?

Big surprise, I don't drink Oprah's beverages either.  In fact, Oprah's couch is the go to destination for people who wish to tell truths that are just better dressed lies than before.  Not to be trusted.

It's not that I don't want to believe, it's that I just can't when I see the lies so naked in front of me.  I don't understand how so many people line up behind media creations and vow fealty to undeserving people, it's the same thing with the Khardashians.  None of these people are finer than you or better than your friends, they are products on a very big shelf with shiny packaging designed to siphon off your funds.  And their lies always catch up to them, the same way lies catch up to all of us, only to be turned into another marketing ploy.

Any publicist will tell you to 'Hugh Grant' it these days; do the talk show tour and bravely share the story of how you were seduced by fame.

In fairness, I will acknowledge that Lance Armstrong raised a lot of money for cancer research, but this does not give him a pass.  I submit that Lance could have raised the same amount with just the honest story of his survival and without winning the Tour de France.  It just would have taken more time and, this is the crucial part, Lance would not get to play the rock star that way.

He's a fame whore, we are all fame whores in some way, look at me trying to get your attention right now. And it's okay to want some of that for yourself, but it is not okay to make yourself into a lie in order to be famous.  Technically, it's fraud.

Lance Armstrong defrauded you and some clever attorney out there should file a class action suit on behalf of everyone who believed in him.  He owes you, don't let him off the hook.

1 comment:

  1. My sister and I were talking about Lance Armstrong at 0200 am the other morning when we were driving our Mama back from the ER. We both agree he is a prize idiot and has let not just the millions of people who have supported him down but his colleagues in cycling down. Thank goodness for Sir Chris Hoy and Sir Bradley Wiggins :) Interesting insight Cairn - Love it.