Thursday, December 27, 2012

List Hit

It's that time of year again Travellers!  The calendar year is drawing to an end, we have survived the elections, doomsday and Christmas, so it is time for a bit of fun.  Everyone is making lists this time of year since it is an easy way to recap the year that was.  I do love a good list, ask around, because a solid list is a busy chef's best friend and a great way to de-clutter an overburdened memory.

I have several lists going regarding the promotion of The Last Prospector, but this is that lovely slack time between the two holidays when no real work gets done.  I have no desire to upset that particular facet of Americana, so the following lists have absolutely no social or nutritive value.

Empty calories are the best kind, n'est ce pas?  (A little French for my niece)

10 Random Things That I Love

  1. Pez Dispensers
  2. David Attenborough
  3. When a plan comes together
  4. Dive bars with pinball machines
  5. Steel drums
  6. Warm peaches picked from the tree on a hot afternoon
  7. The smell of paperwhite narcissus
  8. Big, fat black bumblebees
  9. When one of my kids actually listens to me
  10. Not doing dishes
My 3 Most Favorite Pet Peeves
  1. People who don't even try to say my name right.  IT'S JUST 5 LITTLE LETTERS PEOPLE, QUIT MAKING IT HARDER ON YOURSELF.  C+air+n, that's all it is, just one syllable so PLEASE stop calling me Corrine.
  2. People who drive as if they are NOT sharing the planet with 7 billion OTHER people.  Courtesy counts.  Always.
  3. Lazy chefs who think trying to sell me mashed potatoes with the skins still on is a culinary delight.  It's not, it's lazy so peel the damned potatoes or go sell insurance.
The List of the Finest Movies Ever Made About Food
  1. Babette's Feast - The very finest example about the sheer joy of creation.
  2. Big Night - The ultimate restaurant movie
  3. Jean de Florette/Manon of the Spring - Two powerful companion pieces about the beautiful agony of growing food.
  4. Eat, Drink, Man, Woman - Love is food and food is love.
  5. Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle - Because cravings were made to be satisfied.
Things I Would Change If I Was In Charge
  1. Katey Sagal would be declared a National Treasure.
  2. Safeway would be forced to abandon its disgusting policy of not allowing employees to taste the prepared food before selling it.  Shame on you Safeway and any other purveyor of food with the same idiotic mandate.
  3. Public offices would be filled by lottery drawings, thus ending the ugliness of political dumbassedness.
  4. All bar stools would have backs on them.  Yeah, I know they take up too much precious space at the bar, but I need a place to hang my jacket.  And nice purses should not go on the floor, you know.
  5. MTV would be gone so no more stupid 14 year old girls will deliberately get pregnant in a bid for TV stardom.
  6. All of the Khardashians would be forced to learn an actual trade, something that benefits society in some way.  Like making fries at McDonalds, with time a couple of them could actually master that.
Books & Authors That Shaped Me
  1. James Michener - I can't say that one of his books would make my top 10 list, but I read most of his stuff in my teens and through him I developed a discerning eye for the big picture.
  2. Addie Pray by Joe David Brown - No one told me this sweet tale about grifters in the depression was not a children's book.  It was my absolute favorite story since I first read it at the age of eight and am still a little pissed that my parents did not name me Trixie Delight.
  3. The Bourne Identity - The book, not the movie, yes it was a book first.  One of the most golden, most valuable, pieces of advice I ever got came from this book.  It never occurred to me until I saw those two magic words put together that they even belonged together, but they do.  THINK GEOMETRICALLY, omg I can't even begin to say how those two words affected me.  Linear thinking was never my bag anyway.
  4. Sinclair Lewis - Quite simply the finest writer America ever produced, Main Street is a timeless look at the American condition and Elmer Gantry is just breathtaking in its exploration of fame.  All of you who are grousing that it's not Hemingway can suck it, what people see in that loser totally escapes me.
  5. Douglas Adams - This guy gave us all some really great advice: Don't panic.  For that alone, I am eternally grateful, but he also gave us pure silliness and genuine laughter in story form.  
  6. Papillon - I could write an entire book on what I learned from this book and how it shaped my life.  But I already have several irons in the book fire, so I will sum it thusly:  Never give up, no matter what, always keep looking for a way and never, ever STOP TRYING.
The 2 Big Ticket Items I Have Always Wanted But Never Afford
  1. The Grace Kelly bag by Hermes.  I know it's ridiculous, so much money for just a purse, but it's one of the most beautiful things my eyes have ever seen.  I am a handbag ho, this is not news, and that is the best handbag ever conceived.  If I had an extra ten grand lying around, I would spend it on the Kelly.
  2. A food truck.  I have wanted one for 20 years, but I no longer want one for business purposes.  Now I just want a kitchen on wheels, is that too much to ask?

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